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By C. Antonio Romero

NEW YORK, 31 AUGUST 2006 —"Sculptor" Daniel Edwards , who gave us the Britney Spears birth sculpture , has now moved on to literalized celebrity crap: a purported first "poop" from Suri Cruise, the as-yet-unseen fruit of the womb of Katie Holmes (not to mention the loins of Scientology's own Tom the Baptist).

The peculiar rendering of Britney Spears in mid-birth on a bearskin rug was at least a pretty fair piece of sculpture, even if its real value seemed to be no more than a prank for April Fool's Day. But is the new offering anything more than what it purports to be: crap, dipped in bronze (the Golden Age being long since past)?

Daniel Edwards 'Suri cruise bronze poop' sculture

Suri Cruise's Baby Poop Bronzed for Charity
Sculptor: Daniel Edwards
Crapla Kesting Fine Art, Brooklyn, NY

Or is Edwards even smarter than we gave him credit for last time? Perhaps this trace of an unseen child (who some say is a potential Scientology Messiah) is in fact a wry commentary on faith, demonstratio eorum quae non videntur...

Or even, in an age where celebrities supplant the old gods as objects of veneration and loathing, it's appropriate that we have not even the relic itself, but an imitation of the memorialization of the worthless stool from the first breakfast of a child whose very existence is yet in doubt. ("Worthless", of course, is a relative term, since the ultimate value of the item may be set by the price fetched in the eBay auction, or the prices fetched by the plaster replicas of the bronze that the gallery has commissioned from Edwards.)

There are so many resonances here–between celebrities and gods, between these two children and other holy children, between Spears as wanna-be-Madonna-with-not-quite-visible child and Suri as supposed twenty-first-century hidden God-child–that one begins to suspect that Edwards isn't just full of shit. While we yet withhold our faith in his hidden order, we shall watch his future efforts with hope, and interpret them with charity.

Reception for Suri ’s bronzed baby poop and presentation of the proceeds raised by Capla Kesting Fine Art for March Of Dimes will be held September 8th from 6:00 to 9:00 PM at 121 Roebling St., Brooklyn NY 11211. The gallery can be reached at or by phone at 917-650-3760.

C. Antonio Romero is the Nouveau editor at

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